That's the most evil thing about adultery and polygamy in general. Having multiple relationships just isn't right when your partner is unaware of your endeavors and you don't even think about your partner when doing the deed. I'm sure there's couples who are down to have multiple relationships, but let's be real. Most normal people aren't like that. People like Isadora are destroying the institution of marriage. Marriage is a social union and a legal contract between two people. What does that say about society then if people constantly break these contracts to have sex with one another? There should no longer be any purpose of marriage then. We might as well just partake in orgies and populate the world with bastard children then. It's 2012...the apocalypse is coming anyways. What the hell?!
Personally, I think polygamy is dangerous especially to someone like me who has never been in a long-term relationship and does not really believe in hooking up. I want a meaningful relationship where my girl and I can see eye-to-eye and be happy together. I don't want any third wheelers coming in and disrupting something this precious that can only be between us. Especially another guy who's better looking, stronger, richer, etc. It will crush me. As selfish as this sounds, I want to be the one guy, nobody else, who makes my girl happy. I know a lot of relationships and marriages are not like this. Divorce is okay if the marriage is unhealthy for both parties. That is why people need to be better judges of character. You can't just dive into a relationship and expect things to blossom immediately. You have to skinny dip, take it one step at a time. If it's not working out, end it. If it does, then you may have something special. Just don't do it with five other people at the same time...
I find your argument really interesting. You bring up the concept of "evil" a lot so what do you have to say about people who are not religious? If you don't believe in a hell, what does evil mean? Will a quote from the bible really convince you to change your ways? Also, did Isadora really have a zipless fuck with Adrian? I thought that their relationship didn't work out because they were not a zipless fuck, she knew all of his problems and lost the beauty of simply appreciating a beautiful stranger for their body.
ReplyDeleteWow! I really like your passion for the topic because it makes for an interesting and controversial post. I just wanted to bring up one thing that might advance your argument. You may want to reexamine the relationship between polygamy and adultery. It seems like the crux of your argument (about what's good) is fidelity. Polygamy suggests fidelity, albeit with multiple people. On the other hand, adultery seems to suggest infidelity to one person without, necessarily, the fidelity between those who commit the adultery. With these new definitions is polygamy still "evil"?
ReplyDeleteChristina and Michael make excellent points, ones that should be taken into consideration if you want to make a more logical claim about monogamy. While I agree that monogamy may be the way to go for most people, I don't think we should just accept it without questioning the motives behind it as well as how it creates normative categories that end up oppressing certain groups of people. Can we embrace monogamy without attacking other modes of relationality and intimacy? Without labeling them as "evil"? Personal opinions are fine (of course), but they are *always* ideologically and politically motivated, and I think we would be doing ourselves a disservice if we didn't acknowledge how and to what effect these opinions keep "others" who don't share our beliefs on the margins.
ReplyDeleteYour passion on this topic really jumps off the page, and I think thats very commendable! But I would like to challenge a couple of things you said in your first paragraph about the sinfulness of polygamy. If we're talking about why the institution of marriage exists, why people search for partners, or why people hate being alone, a lot of the answer will come down to happiness. People want relationships for personal fulfillment and meaning--something I think you even state later on when you talk about wanting a meaningful relationship. But if someone wants to engage in polygamy, and all parties agree, then whats wrong with it? Who are we to say that something is evil if it's making other people happy? I can totally applaud your morals and I personally make similar decisions in my life, but I don't think we have a right to judge what other people want to do or what makes other people happy.
ReplyDeleteI really like your message here, but for the most part it seems to address polygamy as something that is evil because it is cheating. How would you feel about a polygamous relationship that is agreed upon by everyone? Do you think that can exist and if so, is that still evil?
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