I have never been much of a partier; maybe it is because I’m shy, but it just isn’t really my scene. However, one night during winter break, two of my best friends forced me to venture out into Hollywood with them. Estrella had done her homework and knew exactly where she wanted to go so Katherine and I just went along for the ride. After an hour long debate over whether or not we needed to change in order to be in appropriate “club attire” we agreed that we were wearing just enough sequins and headed out.
After we got inside the club, Katherine insisted that she use the restroom so we meandered our way straight to the line. When the door opened, the guy and girl at the front the jumped into the bathroom together, we could all guess what they were doing. I asked Estrella why there was a guy in drag and she just shrugged and said that it was normal. That should have been the first sign. It wasn’t until Katherine had finally gotten into the bathroom that a guy in line started talking to us.
“So did you guys come together?”
“Yes!” Estrella exclaimed, “I had to drag Christina out here!”
“Aww. So how long have you been together then?”
“Umm what do you mean?”
“Like how long have you been dating?”
Things got awkward. We just sort of looked at each other and he saw the confusion in our ours. “ OH MY GOD you didn’t know it was a gay club?!” I couldn’t stop laughing. When Katherine, finally came out of the bathroom we finally went to the dance floor. It hit us so hard. There were oiled men, in just briefs, dancing in cages and on boxes. I was so shocked and nothing from my conservative high school had even come close to preparing me for anything like it.
I honestly had never questioned my gender or sex until that night, and I felt so uncomfortable when other girls would come up behind me and try to dance with me. It was weird but also amazing. I was experiencing a whole new world and that is what made it wonderful. For the first time, I was forced to question my gender and sexuality and although I came to the same conclusions that I have always believed, it was nice to explore my beliefs. That night was terribly awkward and I felt like a completely outsider, but at least I was able to take something away from that experience.
great story! I posted mine first without looking at yours but I also wrote about going to a gay bar. MIne was with a bunch of friends though (who are gay and could show me the ropes!)
ReplyDeleteI thought a lot about how I was alone there and felt like an "outside" as well, however it wasn't my "turf". I like how you were open to dancing with other girls and opened up to the experience! I know that when I go out dancing with my friends who are gay, the greatest thing about it is the lack of judgment; there is a complete an utter sense of euphoria in the air at those clubs: everyone, gay straight, whoever, is dancing with everyone. You do question your sexuality and gender, and I have questioned mine. I once even thought I was in love with my best friend (he's gay), however that soon subsided. It's merely the idea that when you enter the dark corners of the club, you don't know someones sexual orientation or gender just by looking at their face...
I really like your story; it makes me want to go to a gay bar or club and experience what it is like to be the gender minority in a party atmosphere. I feel like it would be a very interesting and changing experience as you would question what is normal and maybe re-develop your perceptions of gender and of its societal expectations.
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